When Jim finally angled too far away from the conversation and fell on his backside, every woman scattered wildly. A few tables were upended in the chaos, and nearly all of the plates, silverware and glasses crashed to the ground. But they were on sand and not lacking for drama, so Jim was safe and nothing was broken. Dirty yes, but the mouths that were being served were not exactly pristine. Studies had confirmed this. Human saliva was more unclean than the drool of any household pet. And while dogs and cats were the only animals acknowledged for this consideration, a return to the joy of the day’s offerings was certainly a scientific possibility. The word possibility was only thrown in to account for a panic that may or may not have been coming to a short lived end. While Jim had still been in contact with only the air, awaiting the second clause of Newton’s first law, he was already preparing to spring up as soon as he felt the first few granules of sand against his neck. At his height, and with the direction of his fall, his instincts projected this as the most likely point of impact. And then it was over, Jim was certain he no longer wanted to continue as an interruption. From such a low vantage point, the giants were restless and without organization. More than that, they needed a leader. Someone to assure the crowd, and coax them back to the tables. Even if the wooden frames remained upside down, they could use the legs the same way that a rough day used a bar, for balance and for distraction. Jim had righted himself and placed a half full glass on the square bottom, that was now a square top. Either way, he was lucky with his find, because the initial shock of the fall had dried his mouth. The women had composed themselves or they had just grown tired of yelling. All were quiet and all watched Jim. Gradually, they found their personal items which meant they were back to where they had been sitting. Since Jim had arrived late, he had been placed at the front, so now one by one, each woman passed him. They were silent except for when they wished him well. A few even brushed his arms. Not many did this , but just enough for Jim to realize it meant nothing on a personal level. Soon, they were all near the shore heading north. Jim noticed one woman looking back, and he became hopeful, just at the moment that a large clump of sand fell from his forehead, and landed in his glass. His drink fizzed and her face was gone. Jim lifted the rim to his lips and crunched the liquid in his mouth. As implausible as that seemed, what did science say about someone who was not able to properly judge a fall? As a self-appointed redeemer, he would have been better served to have rolled amidst the sand, studies show, not every group needs a leader, but even Newton would agree–everyone loves a pet.